Mother Of Multiplies ( M.O.M)

I have belonged to a Facebook group of Physician Mother of Multiples for many years . On this platform women physicians swap helpful advice with each other, related to raising multiples – twins, triplets, quadruplets etc etc

We share advice on a variety of topics ranging breastfeeding advice to dilemmas about having twins graduating from different colleges on same weekend… how do parents manage the need to clone themselves in two different states?🤔🤔

On this platform and others alike , I have made new friends and reconnected with old friends as we navigate being working mothers of multiples( M. O.M)

In general, I have always felt blessed to share space with mothers of ALL types, whose wisdom are pearls and our common experiences , reassuring and comforting.

Mothering is a BIG task that can leave us at times questioning our abilities. Therefore any time one gets reassurance that they are not alone in whatever struggle/ challenge/puzzles OR even Joy equals a good thing!

Thirteen years ago today, my DH * and I joined this beautiful club of Parents of Twin Boys, ( with our 17 month old daughter who already blessed us with our original Parent title status !)

Life WAS busy AND beautiful!

I vividly recall my LONG twin pregnancy complete with a medically indicated bed rest beginning at 19.4 wks EGA which “ interrupted “ my residency training program at the time . My family supported me in more ways than I can even enumerate! Thank you 🙏🏾

My SIL helped nanny our 17 month daughter, while helping me stay off my feet. My mother came into town and supervised that I was eating enough calories to gain appropriate weight for the twins , Incase I go into preterm labor and they “ come early”.

My DH was my ROCK- relying on him literally for both physical and emotional support when I was weakened physically or fighting my own doubts.

I was scared but hopeful.

My wonderful Obgyn referred me to an amazing high risk Obgyn who was God sent in EVERY way and managed my pregnancy till we delivered two healthy wonderful boys into the world close to midnight on June 24th 2009!

Interestingly they were almost born on different dates since they were born 8 mins apart through a natural birth at 11:37 pm and 11:45 pm.. and we even avoided any NICU stay… phew and alleluia!

Grateful for twin actually born on SAME day!🥰

They turn 13 yrs old tonight and I couldn’t be more grateful to God for their light in our lives! They are healthy, brilliant, kind and handsome young men and I get the blessing of being their mama♥️♥️

I am giddy with excitement to celebrate them this entire weekend and in the meantime as I await the sun rising on this glorious day .. I lift them up in prayers and ask you to join me in sending up a prayer of thanksgiving and blessings on their lives.

Happy 13 th birthday to our Double Blessings ♥️♥️, pray lines always fall in pleasant places for you both.

With All My Love,

M.O.M

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences . Please feel free to also “follow” by finding and clicking the follow icon, makes it easier to share these musings with you and ensures that you can get notifications on future blog posts and not miss out !💕

*DH ( Darling Husband)

Champions For Christ

How do you respond to compliments about your children?.. Aww thanks, OR that’s sweet of you to say, OR yes we’re lucky they’re great kids, OR we thank God for his blessings? etc etc

All of these are appropriate response in my opinion, however I especially like to return the praise to GOD.

You see, last week a dear friend was going to be one of the leaders of the music ministry at a local Parish’s VBS (Vacation Bible School) . The theme of the VBS week was Champions For Christ.

This friend had inquired about having our oldest daughter assist her in teaching the VBS younglings. After I wrote her to inform her that she was already committed elsewhere that week, a lightbulb moment occurred to me!

It went something like this in my head…. “Well she couldn’t do it Buhhh , what if our younger three ALL could?.. I mean why not send our twin 12 yr old boys with very little dancing experience, to lead music and dance ministry at VBS?…..

It continued…

“I mean ,sure , they played little Joseph In the musical Joseph and the technicolor dream coats years ago,that ought to count for something right? Besides, they will have their younger sister who is mostly a “grandma” with her 12 yr old wisdom and her fantastic dancethletics ( I know , I know it’s not a real word lol)😉 shepherding them.”

My friend jumped on the idea once I shared it with her, maybe because she was part desperate for helpers to help her teach those random praise songs and dances she was charged with teaching preschoolers to 2nd graders, OR just a lovely friend and a great supporter of our family. I personally vote for the latter.

In any case, she bought and loved the idea and I was thrilled to unglue my kids’ eyes off their video games and TVs and get my three tweens out of the house for a few hours each day that week!

WIN- WIN!!!

A few hours after I dropped them off bright and early , the first morning, ofcourse not before I double checked that no one forgot their deodorant or water bottles. I began settling into my clinic when I got the most lovely surprise.

It was a text , filled with compliments for my kids! I have to be honest with you , my dear readers..I was glowing internally, because in my humble opinion… As parent , OUR Children can truly be OUR biggest compliment in life .

Throughout the week, the compliments kept pouring in, at times extended from people I hadn’t even met! , who told my friend, how much our children were blessing them, and how well behaved they were … HEAD SWOON☺️

Then came this layer of awakening, …I began to wonder whether I was surprised by the compliments?.. not entirely. Then I wondered if I too , give my children the evidence of my TOTAL belief in THEIR abilities consistently?.. hmm🤔. The truth is that as a mother , I find myself charged with DUTY.. duty to raise good citizens of the world. This is a duty I take very seriously, heck I even make my living (as a Child and Adolescents Psychiatris) helping others raise good citizens for our world.

However sometimes, DUTY can drown us from perspective. We forget to be PRESENT to all the good that is already around us, all the yield that our DUTY is already producing. We keep focusing on doing more and more, including inspecting for water bottles and double checking that deodorants have been applied lol.

It could be like missing the forest for the trees!

Well, this week’s Catheletics VBS at Incarnate Word Parish , reminded me to be MINDFUL of my yield as a mother . I am very grateful to be raising young citizens of the world whose inner light shines bright, even when I am not right there MOTHERING them. I am also grateful that they seem to be humble to their abilities too.

Therefore , I have received those compliments graciously AND return the praise to the one who made ALL of this possible…GOD!

Ultimately, VBS ended with a bang! Catchy songs and dances were learned by so many younglins ( and hopefully by some young at heart folks too), my lovely friend and her colleagues, did a fantastic job leading an amazing music ministry at VBS , our children got to spend more time together and grew closer this week – an unexpected gift all around!

I must say, I had hoped the week would go well, however I mostly trusted without any real evidence that our kids will emerge as real Champions for Christ. This was total bonus!

Of course they’re not perfect (yet)lol, but they danced , served as techno guy for audiovisual and bogeyed for Christ, all while mentoring young ones in the process.

I marvel at how the orderer of the universe knows EXACTLY what we need and when. We certainly ALL needed the JOYS and WINS that came from this week’s VBS.

My DH * and I very proud of our kid’s hard work and service to others this week.

Dear reader, when was the last time you took a chance and leaped with trust? How do you respond to compliments of yourself or your children , if you have them? Where is your perspective taking lens these days? I sure hope it’s PRESENT to all the blessings around you , versus muddled with DUTY.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences . Please feel free to also “follow” by finding and clicking the follow icon, makes it easier to share these musings with you and ensures that you can get notifications on future blog posts and not miss out !💕

*DH (Darling husband)

Re Gathering

The world seems to have “ RE OPENED ”!

Regardless of whether you’re in the camp of believing the pandemic is over or not. It doesn’t seem to matter these days as Life goes on .

I have spoken to many people who are marveled at how full their social calendars are becoming PACKED again. Some are thrilled with excitement, while others had still a healthy dose of apprehension at all the upcoming reunions. In some ways, we have all lost some of our social muscles” from lack of use… we may even feel awkward at reconnecting, do we hug , shake or just nod in acknowledgment of the other? Hmm 🤔

Well, just like just like they say in show business – the show must go on! Ready or Not.

And so it did for us this past weekend!

You see , our oldest daughter was receiving her Confirmation into our Catholic Faith, a major milestone in the life of a Catholic . She was choosing to say YES to her faith-in her own way, as a young Catholic adult.

I must admit getting ready to host our first major gathering since the pandemic brought up interesting emotions. I had to prepare and talk about menus with caterers, get home ready, maybe finally make out time to plant my Lillie’s in the yard?.. after all it’s Spring for heavens sake lol.

Oh, and I didn’t forget to pick up the cake. Yes the one I didn’t order ahead of time but hit the jackpot in the refrigerator display of La bon bouche, with the perfectly decorated “Catholic” cake complete with even a rosary on top!!

To say the least, I was excited to have our home even more FULL with family and friends warming the rooms with their laughter and chatter.

Time does what it does best, it flies and by the time I knew it , It was Friday evening and I was on my way to picking up my parents from the airport. Unlike some people, we had been blessed to see our parents during the pandemic. We are very grateful and don’t take this for granted.

Ada’s confirmation was beautifully orchestrated by the hand of God! Details that only God could manage himself fell right into place … her sponsor ( my cousin by marriage n love) drove almost 7 hrs to arrive just in time – thanks to a surprise time zone change, she was actually EARLY!

She got prettied up after her drive and graciously offered to take our celebrant to church while we gathered the rest of the crew.

Church was PACKED! Parking was crazy but the cathedral basilica never fails to draw my AWE with its majestic bizantine architecture. You automatically feel closer to God in all the history so delicately narrated on its ceilings.

She was the most beautiful celebrant, and yes I am a biased momma.

As a mother, I have many prayers for my first earth Angel and today what I say to God is a big THANK YOU for the blessing of this child – turning young lady, and for the blessing and JOY of RE-gathering for my lovely family and friends!

How do you feel about life re opening these days? Have you gathered and for what reasons?

Here are a few pearls that may help make your next gathering more enjoyable and perhaps less daunting .

1) Consider yourself blessed to have the opportunity at life and having occasion to gather – gratitude is key!

2) Build up your excitement about whatever your occasion is.

3) Do your research- do you still need to wear masks or not, what’s the dress code?who are scheduled to be there ?

4) Show up, don’t take yourself too seriously and HAVE fun!!!

Please feel free to share your thoughts and accompanying emotions about our reopening world , if you dare..lol

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences . Please feel free to also “follow” by clicking the follow icon, so you can get notifications on future blog posts💕

Mountains or Oceans.. which holds your Awe?

Observing the tides crash onto the shores, while the ocean breeze powerfully claim its presence blowing and tossing hair and the likes apart.

The sun glistens on top of the blue gray sea, as its’ warmth provides a much needed balance from the chill of the ocean breeze.

There is wonder at the depth of the ocean, and the marvel of all the creatures that inhabit those deep dark waters. To think we have only discovered a very small fraction of the sea world!

I marvel at the creator of all this wonder!

Starring at the distance across the ocean while sitting on the sea shores watching kids at play , making sand castles and proud of the young at heart brave DH*, who agrees with their plan to be covered in beach sand! Lol

Observing children at play enriches the soul indeed.

I marvel at the idle time spent , with people just being!

The sea pelicans’ quick dive into the seas to grab a poor unsuspecting fish for snack, while sea gulls try their luck in finding food around the beach goers .

I marvel at nature’s carefreeness !

In some ways , it’s easier to observe the marvel atop the snow covered mountains.

The majestic presence of the mountains with peaks daring to reach the heavens.

The quiet stillness of the tall birch trees with those eyes that play peekaboo with skiers and snowboarders on their path.

I marvel at the daunting mountain slopes!

It’s incredible that skiing and snowboarding can provide such warmth even as one is surrounded by white powdered cold snow.

I marvel at the irony that one could be warmer on a snow capped mountain, than on a breezy sea at springtime!

Ultimately, I marvel at the giver of all these wonder, the creator of our universe .

The creator holds my Awe in all the infinite dimensions between the mountains and the oceans!

As always, thank you for reading my blog and the privilege of your time . Ofcourse I welcome your comments and any shared experiences . Please feel free to also “follow” by clicking the follow icon, so you can get notifications on future blog posts💕

*DH ( Darling husband)

She Was Gifted A Peacock!💕

The Actual Argentinian Peacock

We are from eastern Nigeria and the holidays are a big time of merriment and social connections.

Growing up., my cousins all gathered in from the different cities where they resided, each of the families heading towards the village- THIS is where all the exciting of the holidays happen.🤗

As Christians, Christmas and Easter where the big holidays , but truth be told our parents also would bring us home to the village for the African traditional holiday of “ Iri ji” aka Yam festival in August. This was in celebration of the Harvest season.

As a child, I relished the times spent in the village during the holidays! Everything seemed electric with all the excitement from all the city dwellers now “ bubbling” through the typically quiet rural farming country sides.

There were lots of lingering and the times were spent visiting relatives and just BEING.

People visited in laws and friends alike , with typically NO AGENDA.

Some times the visits were accomplished by just a stroll to the next village compound , while other visits required long rides in the car on dusty unpaved roads that left your body wobbled with the “ African massage”or nauseated from the bumpy roads .

Either way, once you reached your destination, it was typically full of WARMTH ❤️

Long warm embraces and gifts were typically exchanged . The hosts naturally made such a big fuss about presenting various food delicacies , beginning with presentation of kolanuts to their guests.

As an adult now living in the US, I do miss this precious tradition of fellowship.

My cousins and I are no longer able to all gather in the village for holidays like we did in the past . We deem ourselves very lucky when we can afford to coordinate visits to our home village for any joyous occasion like the holidays.

So in Dec 2021 when my Aunt was spending the holidays in her village, her daughter who is my dear cousin, shared updates and pictures of the trip with me .

One of the pictures she shared was a picture of BEAUTIFUL peacock with it’s feather spread so proudly. It immediately caught my eye and peaked my curiosity … for a peacock in the village is a rare sight .

Then she told me that her mother ( my Aunt ) was just gifted a PEACOCK from Argentina ,during her visit to her sister in law’s home.

I LOVED every bit of that story for so many reasons … OFCOURSE she was gifted an exotic beautiful bird, from her sister in law!

The truth is , she DESERVED such a beautiful gift because she IS beautiful.

I have thought about this charming gift so many times from so many angles … it is a lovely gesture that speaks to the CALIBER of a woman she is . It speaks to the beautiful relationship she has been able to build with her in laws, that they saw her fitting of such a gorgeous exotic bird as a gift.

Truthfully, She IS ELEGANT as a peacock , with her delicate yet proud strides.

It was an all around Beautiful gesture that highlights the wonderful traditions we were lucky to experience growing up in Eastern Nigeria.

In Igbo language, we say “ Mmadu Ka Aku” which translates to Human relations are more valuable than riches!💕

Ultimately, I hope that the people in your lives find you valuable enough to think that you too deserve gifts of a beautiful Peacock ( figuratively speaking ofcourse lol)

Now , now.., don’t despair if you’re not quite there yet. Keep working on developing your BEST self that someday will earn YOU, your own version of a BEAUTIFUL PEACOCK!❤️

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences . Please feel free to also “follow” by clicking the follow button, so you can get notifications on future blog posts💕