Tag: family

Temples around Kyoto

MindMuser MD

Our fifth day in Japan found us waking up for a second morning in beautiful Kyoto.

DH and I woke up at 5:30 am to ride our bikes to a temple about 10-15 mins away from our ABNB into the mountains of Kyoto.

A dear friend had recently visited Japan and recommended we check out this temple that held prayer services at 6am by Shinto (?)monks.

While it wasn’t the easiest having to leave my warm bed so early on our final day in the city of Kyoto, DH and I managed to get out the door by 5:45am . We left our daughters to sleep in( teens and preteens absolutely need theirs 😴 while our sons were still traveling with their school trip group.

As we step out of our door from the quaint home we were renting on the Arcade area, we are greeted by a most beautiful morning. The city was barely awake. The spring temperatures was refreshing , unlike yesterday when it literally rained all day long, there is no rain in the forecast today…yay!

We rode down a main road punctuated every now and then with the most cherry blossoms striking their beautiful poses amidst the sky lines.


Friendly Temple sweeper early in the morning

My leg muscles and cardiovascular system was warming up fast and getting a serious work out , as we rode our bikes up those mountains. I’m trailing behind DH, as usual, and I’m close to panting for more breath.

This exertion is a good reminder for me to keep up my physical fitness, if I plan to keep being able to visit and see wonderful parts of this amazing world.

Anyways , we make it up those daunting mountainous roads through quiet neighborhood, while hardly seeing people on the road.

DH is diligently following his google map directions and I’m doing my best to just keep up .

Finally we arrive at this ancient temple built in 400AD era, and it’s intimidating with its’ charm, architectures and peacefulness.

We were the only humans in sight. There were no prayer ceremonies going on, at least not today. There are many signs posted around , except there were mostly all in Japanese sanscript, so not too helpful to us.. oh well.

DH is in his exploration haven, he seems bold as he leads the way wondering around this ancient temple grounds, as if he’d been there many times before.

My cautious African self is wondering if we REALLY are welcome to be wondering about these parts so freely, but I keep following behind DH.

It looked like we literally had the entire place to ourselves, except from the rooster busy with his wake up calls and a bird that sang out so beautifully, so boldly.

There were signs that shrine worshippers visited often, papers inscribed with prayers hanging on shrine walls, offerings made to the shrine gods, and a parked Toyota van that perhaps belonging to a temple worker.

Finally , I settled in more after several minutes of walking around and seeing beautiful reminders of peace and tranquillity. If morning had a sound of nothingness, then this was it.

Breathing in the freshness of this morning, I surrender to the creator of the day. I was no longer worried that I was intruding on another’s place, instead I started to feel like I too belonged to this place, to this morning. I was no longer afraid and questioning.

I was feeling more at home with the sounds of the mountains, although I couldn’t tell what bird or insect or animal each sound belonged to.

It no longer mattered now, I was just appreciating that that we were all there together this very morning.

In that moment , there was only one thing left to do, just BE in the moment. So I did. I found a stone bench , propped up my legs and began to attempt a meditation.

It was mostly a time for me to breathe in all the gratitude in the air around me. Grateful that I get to be in this place , at this time , with my DH, grateful for my family , for my friends, and for all the many reasons to be thankful for the life that I do have !

I hope and pray that you too can look around and breathe in some reasons to be grateful.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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Enchanted Japan💕

MindMuser MD

On our recent trip to Japan , DH described this country as enchanted, and I couldn’t have agreed more. Except for a brief layover in an airport in Osaka many many years ago, while our way to Bali for our honeymoon, we had never visited Japan.

Therefore when our 7 th graders had an opportunity for a spring break Apoogee ** school trip that could include parents, we were being excited to sign up to travel with them.

First we had to figure out the affordability for our family of six as well as the logistics of tagging along with our twins boys, but this 15 hrs trip made sense for our family for so many reasons!

We also have our amazing niece/god daughter who has been living in Tokyo whom we’ve talked about wanting to visit for soo long now . I’m addition, we as a family had also entertained the idea of hiking Mount Fuji.. I mean why stop at just Mount Kilimanjaro right?😉

Upon landing in Haneida airport in Tokyo , we meet up with our lovely family friends who were traveling on a similar itinerary as us, their young son also traveling with the Ladue Apogee class trip. The first things I observed was how efficiently we moved through customs, picked up our luggage and off we were, trying to navigate the JR train system all on our own. Travel instructions were mostly in Japanese writing (Konchi), and while there were signs in English, they seemed to be in the minority, so you had to pay very close attention reading maps /signs or you missed out.

This idea of needing to pay attention is not uncommon when you travel to a new place, but somehow with the very fast pace of Tokyo’s busy metropolitan’s city with its countless trains, bullet trains,subways, buses running so efficiently on a tight time schedule ~we really needed to pay attention or risk getting lost on this huge city of close to 30 million people.

DH and our daughters 💕💕

I literally give my DH, all the travel credit , on this trip as usual , he had done so much research and pre planning to ensure that our ten days of traveling through Japan was smooth as possible. Our daughters and I had the best time exploring foods ( thanks to recs from our niece/god daughter guide extraordinaire who was quiet fluent in Japanese already), there were cousins and friend times, lots of matcha flavored ice cream and drinks, local snacks from seven eleven on every corner, and we even found Starbucks and McDonald’s there too !

We traveled in mid/late March, with a stroke of good fortune and fate , found ourselves right on the middle of the blooming of the beautiful cherry blossom season! Okay, that was just pure lucky as we could not have planned THAT!

Adaeze and others admiring the cherry blossoms
Philosopher’s path in Kyoto

DH , our two daughters and myself travelled together , while our twin sons travelled and explored with their class travel group . There trip was organized by a tour company EFJ, that included a well planned itinerary , lodging and accommodations as well as a local Japanese guide. We would meet up with their travel group ecru once in a while for dinner or to visit a temple together or just for a hug and a picture! This felt bold,to give our 13 yr old sons’s independence in another country,while being just a text or call away. The teachers and parents that travelled and stayed with the group were all so wonderful, keeping us in the loop as much as possible , amidst wifi woes at times lol.

Twin A waiting for the bullet train
Early morning bike ride on the Philosopher’s path in Kyoto
Me and our Twins 💕💕

We visited several cities in Japan , mostly following along our sons’ itineraries while improvising our own plans here and there. There was A LOT of walking so make sure to pack comfortable shoes . We stayed at nearby ArNBs and hotels except for one night that we shared the same hotel as our sons in the town of Kawaguchi while visiting Mount Fuji.

Experiencing the beauty of this country is incredible, from the intimidating snow capped mountains of Fuji to the beautiful island of Mayijima with its floating Torrin temple gates, numerous beautiful temples and shrines,and the in between cities of Kyoto with its classy charm, the sophistication of Tokyo with its art museums and sharply dressed women and “salaried men” to the sobering city of Hiroshima – Japan had it all to offer an inquisitive tourist!

Beyond the beautiful landscapes of this country, I believe I was intrigued the most by its people and culture. I had SO many questions.. how do they manage to keep the peace around them ? Is this really a NO gun society ?wow! Everyone seemed to simultaneously mind their own business while also showing respect to eachother! How are there hardly any trash cans and yet the streets and the train stations were SO clean?!, where were their homeless population? And how is everyone seem to be so nicely dressed, appearing to have purpose with something to do/ somewhere to go?, how are they so quiet on massively crowded buses and trains? Why do you not even smell people standing so close to you, armpits raised to hold on to poles for stability on those crowed moving trains?

I also wondered a lot about how efficient the Japanese technology appeared to be, warm toilet seats, with badoe , even in public places?!😳, bathroom so compact and efficient , random anti fog mirrors in hotel bathrooms( this was such a champion!, I mean who really wants to get out of shower , only to view their reflection in a cloudy mirror? Yes sometimes those bathroom fans just don’t cut it I’m sorry lol.

I also noticed that while I still needed to pay attention in order not to miss bullet trains which ran so precisely on time, by the seconds even! As the days went on, I became even more and more relaxed .

I was not worried about my safety in Japan. Our brilliant god daughter’s apt explanation that Japan allows for creative thinking because your fight or flight nervous system is not always activated, trying to ensure your safety. This felt absolutely true to me, it was much easier to be in the present in the moments, here in Japan.

Ultimately, this turned out to be a trip of a lifetime. I keep telling my DH that he really has a natural calling to travel planning if he ever gets tired of being a shrink lol

In all seriousness , I would love to return to Japan again very soon, not only for the amazing foods, sights and shopping. I would return for the peace and tranquility of this place. Amidst the bustling cities, visiting beautiful temples tucked in along lovely hikes and trials provided me with much needed quiet.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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** DH ( darling husband)

**Apogee ( gifted class name at Ladue Middle School)

Duckie Drama

MindMuser MD

We have an adventurous family with lots of travel interest.

White water rafting on the salmon river in the wilderness of Idaho during the hot summer month of July 2021.

This was during the pandemic and a 5 days river trip vacation seemed like a reasonable idea.

You see we had had a great time floating down the Colorado river the previous summer with our extended family, so this time we invited several family friends to float down the Idaho salmon river with us.

Our traveling crew consisted of at least 6 different families , some were life long friends while others just met for the first time the morning we set out on our on River trip. Everyone was wonderful.

In fact there are so many stories to tell you about this trip however I will focus on one particular floating day .

We had river guides who were truly shepherding us and keeping us safe while we enjoyed the adventures on the river.

There was an inflatable raft called the “ Duckie” that was an option for any takers to raft down the river . I asked DH if he would ride with me and he gladly accepted ( ofcourse not before making sure that no other takers who wanted a turn to float down on this particular Duckie)

Our kids stayed on more sturdy rafts with family friends and were having a blast . Some of the moms were either on other rafts or on the bigger boat calmly enjoying the warm breeze and nature with a cold beverage…. Smart😉

I choose more adventure ,so off DH and I went on this “Duckie” . I sat in the front providing the “ power” while DH was behind steering us in the direction we needed to travel . I had a lot of laughter and squeals as I enjoyed riding the waves while DH seemed to be enjoying hitting rapids that produced even more laughter and squeals from me.

Then I started to overhear the guides talking about needing to stop to “regroup “ before the last rapid before we get to camp for the night . The head guide was giving instructions to the order guides who were rating the order boats.

I started to feel a bubble of worry rising within me as I observed them “plotting“ from our Duckie. So I asked the female guide what they were “plotting “ but her only response was “ it’ll be fun” with a coy smile and a shoulder shrug that I immediately interpreted as a way to calm my nerves.

So I sat back focusing on my rowing to provide the power for our raft while encouraging , okay maybe warning him, DH to steer us safely.

The Duckie

On white water rafting trips, the thing is you can hear the rumbles of the rapids before you even see them, so the suspense is real and palpable!

The guides had given us very specific instructions before that last rapid to avoid the left side at a particular point “ no matter what”.

Apparently that spot on the river has a “ hole “ that people can literally get sucked under into a vortex that seems like a washing machine cycle that is hard to escape from.

So off we go with DH maneuvering our way through the rapids . At the start I felt DH and I working well together and I clearly was trusting him with my life in those moments more than ever .Oh , did I mention that I am not a strong swimmer? Like at all!

Things seemed to be going well until BOOM! … I feel myself get knocked off the Duckie from the side and I went under the water for what felt like A LONG QUIET EERIE TIME.

I popped up again briefly again only to be hit in the head by the same Duckie. That was actually my saving grace as I grabbed on for dear life while my feet dangled in the rushing water.

Let me back up a sec to say that I actually began praying in my mind once I felt me worrying about the upcoming rapid as I was observing the guide prepping.

Psalm 23 was on my mind and I thought about God’s protection of us as we go through “ raging waters”. Those rapids definitely were raging waters😏

God had allowed me to hold on to that Duckie and then I realized too that DH had managed to stay on the Duckie the whole time. This was a double lucky blessing 1) DH was safe 2) DH was able to continue steering the Duckie so I just had to keep holding on to it since I was no strong swimmer.

Truth is I somehow managed to stay calm throughout the raft accident.

I believe it was purely the Holy Spirit that accompanied and encouraged me in those moments when I was under water or struggling to get a hold of that Duckie.

Ofcourse our Duckie accident caused some panic with our children and friends watching as all of this took place. I had lost a water shoe in all the chaos but can you believe one of the other boaters somehow found my shoe and we reunited post Duckie drama.

Shortly after the ordeal we made it to camp for the night and I was mostly quiet and reflective., probably still in shock from all that had transpired.

Nonetheless , the hugs with my children, DH and time spent at camp friends somehow held more value that evening because being alive felt like SUCH a gift!

Have you had a time when you felt you were close to loosing your life? What thoughts did your mind entertain?

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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RED SPORTS CAR

MindMuser MD

1988 , “Ulo Nna” on Hospital Road, Aba, (old) Imo State was notorious for nostalgia and action .

Amidst all that trading action in Aba, sat our family (city) home.

There was never a dull moment on those streets of this bustling traders’ town in the eastern region of Nigeria.

Aba’s warm tropical breeze was stifled with the fumes from the engine exhausts of automobiles crowding the roads of this commercial city’s hustle and bustles.

Aba Ngwa! Is NOT a city for “mugus”(fools)

You have to be very “sharp” to inhabit this land and the children of Aba seem to be packed full of street smarts, straight from their mothers’ wombs.

My grandfather “Nna” was one of the first settlers from our village into Aba township, therefore he had choice property in the heart of the city’s trading posts- on Hospital road.

The house had been passed down to our father from our paternal grandfather Stephen , who moved from the rural village to this trading town Aba ,after becoming one of the first converts to Christianity , in order to pursue and expand his business.

The property on Hospital was really a “watering hole” for our family and so many others. The fronts of the yard were trading stores while the back of the building served as residence for our family and numerous relatives. There were several apartments but all shared a common “ yard” so everyone could easily be in everyone else’ business 😂

Relatives and family friends lived there until they were able to transition successfully to their own homes.

Hospital road had a buzz to it, with trading shops cramped next to eachother. There was always music blaring from record stores, cars honking in traffic and loud jocular conversations amongst traders.

Everyone seemed to always be in huge hurry in this West African town.

71 hospital road,Aba pic courtesy of ILO

The businesses were housed in “ sheds” which comprised of wooden stalls with brilliant artisans making incredible innovative goods for sale , automotive parts traders, import and export sheds, talented tailors creating traditional clothing while others were expert “okirika” traders **

There were always SO many varieties at the markets! A day spent at the local Ariaria market never disappointed, showcasing human interactions depicting life lessons in courage, resilience,humor , love and rivalry.

My Older brother would entertain for hours with these Ariaria market stories.

Aba picture from google

Most Aba roads were heavily crowded and there was a distinct smell of commercialism or maybe it was just those fumes from the over used , poorly constructed and maintained gutter drainage systems…eww!

Traders lined every street corners, forcefully hassling passersby to purchase this or that from them . Everywhere you looked some one was selling something!

Only very few areas in Aba attempted to prioritize residential plots. We felt lucky to have cousins in those suburbs. The irony is that we each likely fantasized about trading living spaces with one another, at times. The quiet of the suburbs with its’ loneliness and less mosquitoes, competed against the excitement of those crowded trading streets of Aba.

Aba
Picture from outdoors.ng

Living in these commercialized areas meant close interactions with loud mouthed traders. It was not unusual for traders to audaciously comment on outfit choices of passersby, at times cat calling the pretty women or detesting others inappropriately dressed asking them ,who exactly allowed them out of their gates that morning .

Some of these unsolicited comments were harsh and could cut deep into ones self esteem, while others were so complimentary that your ego swelled bigger than an ishi aki**

My sister and I are seven and nine year olds with neatly braided tight cornrows on our hair. Our younger brother, a boisterous five year old who was obsessed with the newest Mike Tyson haircut style would beg our mother to allow him to get same at the barber shop.

Our father had a never exhausting fountain of energy and fun stored within him. Dad always found a way to literally infuse FUN into even the most mundane activities. It was no surprise that he would offer us a JOYRIDE in his old red fiat convertible which we all fondly called “ THE SPORTS CAR” .

Dad with another red sports car – New Orleans 2012

Sports car was only driven on special occasions.

We especially enjoyed the ride when we were all piled high ,rooftop down, standing room only , as many cousins and siblings as could possibly pack into the small convertible.

Then it was showtime….let the fun and joyous screams commence!

We took the joyrides at dusk when the blazing warmth of the sun was gone , and took with it all those loud mouthed traders whose shops were now closed for the day’s hustle. The crowded streets became empty and creepily quiet.

Dad would thrill us with the car ride revving up his engine every once in a while, our hair tossing in the wind, specs of sand from the tarred road peppered our laughing faces as we held onto for our dear sweet life.

On some occasions, Dad gave permission for our driver DeePee to ride us around. Dee Pee drove EVEN faster😅

Life seemed so carefree back then as if it contained no real problems.

Now as I reminisce on these sweet carefree memories, I am forced to appreciate the imminent passage of time.

I am grateful to have had joyrides in the red sports car, for that patriarchal home on hospital road with its hustling neighborhood that help toughen my skin and has in turn made me more resilient.

However, you know what I’m MOST appreciative of ?…..my FAMILY – close and distant relatives whose lives have enriched my life and have contributed tremendously to these BELOVED memories 💕

Which sweet memories of your childhood do you have to share?

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

Find and click on the “follow” icon, so you can get notifications on future blog posts via email and not miss out !💕

** okirika ( used clothing mostly from European countries for sale)

**ishi aki ( a large African fruit)

Faith Over Fear

MindMuser MD

Life is such a mixed bag , of joys, moments of sorrow and loss, fear and faith, times of enjoying great health and other times of sickness around us . This is the reality of what it mean to be alive, taking the good and the bad while finding ways to appreciate the entire process of living.

I have had a great loss recently. My beloved father was a giant Iroko tree and his exit has all who sheltered under his love , exposed to the harsh reality of life without him.

It is Dec 30th and we have just arrived into Abuja airport, Nigeria , from Owerri . My sister and our husbands with our cars packed full of our children and cousins, in laws.. we have just accomplished one of our lives most solemn milestone . We have successfully laid our father and grandfather to rest, next to his own father in the soil of their homeland.

This season has been a very long 3plus months since the death of our father on that unsuspecting September 15th morning. The day was Our Lady of Sorrows feast day in our Catholic faith . It commemorates the day that Mary the mother of our savior Jesus receive his body from the cross after he drew his last breath on the cross and proclaimed “ It is finished “. Jesus’ finishing of his business on earth commenced the salvation of humanity.

Therefore we as Christians are able to breathe easier knowing that at the end of our time here on earth,as believers we can inherit eternity in heaven with God.

That day on calvary cross , I imagine a sense of relief that Jesus must have felt upon completing his “love obligation “ to humanity. Today, I too feel a deep level of relief completing my obligation to have my father’s last wishes to be buried in his homeland accomplished.

Our father’s burial occurred in stages , first in October we gathered to honor his life and legacy in St. Louis, Missouri. A service of Songs event planned in a hurry that drew a crowded hall full of family , friends and well wishers.

Then there was the funeral service held in New Orleans,the next month in November. Our parents Committee of friends showed up in style to help us plan such a befitting celebration of life event in honor of our father and grandfather. The whole event was magnificent with the sour note being the absent of our Dad in the physical form , although I am convinced his spirit along with choirs of angels dances along the New Orleans brass band that escorted his body out of the church after the mass!

The day after United States of America’s thanksgiving celebration in Baltimore, Maryland where one of my brothers lives, they too gathered to honor our Dad in a very special way.

Finally our father’s body was travelled back to his homeland in Nigeria, where we ALL gathered against all the odds to honor the giant of man in a most befitting burial mass interment and cultural celebration. Chief Omenka is a peaceful giant and gem and it was no surprise that every detail of his burial was smooth sailing

What happened in Ezeka Umunze Orlu a few days ago was a miracle, an outpouring of the immeasurable grace of God. Every detail of our Dad’s burial went smoothly and our guests returned to their locations safely, all the praise to our God.

We as a family have had a lot of support from loved ones near and far in order to accomplish this and we are most grateful for the many ways our loved ones and well wishers have contributed their support of us. A direct deflection of the value they placed on our late father Chief Omenka, who in his lifetime accumulated so much good will which is now trickling down on us his children and grandchildren.

There were so many who gave their time, some their advice and wisdom and yet others supported us spiritually, financially,emotionally and physically.

How can I thank you for what your love has meant to us in this season. Please know of our grateFUL hearts and wishes for every wonderful blessing in your lives.

I had so many supporting and encouraging us along the way . At times when doubt attempted to derail me, I had to rely on others to increase my courage.

Ultimately, it truly was GRACE of God that carried us through. We travelled across continents with our entire families to Eastern Nigeria , at a time when many forwarded us of so many dangers including the risk of kidnapping , all of this in the backdrop of the upcoming political election in the country. If I said I was not terrified about the risks involved, then I would be telling a big lie.

The truth of that I was scared but I also had faith in a God is bigger than all my fears including kidnappers. I prayed Psalm 91 consistently to fortify myself and invited others to pray along with me. This Psalm provided me with the comfort daily as our trip approached . Everyday I trusted more and more in the promises of God’s protection on those who put their trust in him. I trusted God and he has over delivered!!! Worthy is his name!!

Our Dad is a special creation of God and he will sorely be missed …nonetheless he lives on in us his children and grandchildren and therein lies his legacy by the special grace of God🙏🏾

Now we are left to live on with the memories that we will cherish of his life with us. Dad was indeed a gatherer, and no surprise that his burial gathered SO many despite the uncertainties and insecurities that was in the air at the time .

Following his burial and thanksgiving mass , we had opportunities for family reunions, anniversary and birthday celebrations. There were graces for loved ones who were spared from harm on the roads and from illness. All of these make up that mixed bag of life! We keep muddling through the process of life while keeping our eyes out for moments of Joy.

Ofcourse we took many safety precautions on this trip however I am convinced that my Dad was already busy at work in heaven watching over all of us .

At the end of my fears for what it would take to travel home honor my father’s final wish to be buried in his homeland Nigeria this Christmas was my faith in God to see us all through safely.

God never fails.

Finally thank you all for your support and well wishes. Our family wishes you and yours a Merry Christmas Season when light entered into our dark world in the form of baby Jesus and now prayers for a blessed new year💕