relaxation – MindMuse

Uwa Mgbede ka nma

March 24, 2024March 25, 2024 MindMuser MD

Uwa mgbede ka nma – Igbo proverb that translates to “ laidback life in the evenings are sweeter”

We had the pleasure to spend sometime on a beautiful island south of Tampa during our recent spring break holidays. This quaint beach town has the allure of towns where time moved slower than the rest of the world. It was whimsical to wake up to the sound of the ocean tides crashing against the shores- a natural rhythm that has been in motion for billions of years. Those waves crash onto those white sandy shores day and night regardless of who is there to watch or marvel at it .

As the morning sun rose, so did the inhabitants of this tiny beautiful island, waking up and making their way to secure their spots along those white sandy beaches with their lounge chairs and sun umbrellas . There , we positioned ourselves to spend majority of the lazy day- some swimming those ocean waves , daring to go all the way to the booie. Sun tanners lying prostrate hoping to get nicely roasted by the sun, others snorkeling to admire schools of fish beneath the surface of those waves while still some sat on the white sandy shores watching for the playful dolphins nearby.

We were gifted the knowledge of this beautiful island from family ; generations earlier than us. Now over the years, we have been blessed to share this beautiful island with grandparents , cousins, aunties and uncles. Memories made here seem to be seared deep and easily conjured up with an amazing freshness- as if you can still taste the sweetness of the ice creams shared together on sunset evenings or the lovely sounds of the daily musicians from the near by beach restaurants.

Living on this island did not require much fuss at all. We walked around barefoot, all day long without a care about where our sandals or Jordan’s were located. It was freeing, to have soft white beach sand between your toes , and that crunching sand sound that your feet makes as it walks towards the water.

This island gifted us idleness and time to appreciate conversations with loved ones, especially with four teenagers. A rare gift these days , given the competition with their new age technology devices. Looking out in the waves, your mind can be busy with wonder or quiet with appreciation- both are very acceptable.

Sunsets on this island are breathtaking! We all gathered on the large porch to witness what beauty the creator wanted to display to us that evening. We hurried to transition from our beach day and get our dinners ready by sunset . Deep conversations such as curiosity about our existence on this earth , our position in the Milky Way etc seemed to be inspired by the awe of the sunsets and we learned truths from our loved ones both young and old.

After spending time on the island, everyone has been sun kissed allowing their beauty to glow . We feel rejuvenated after spending time in nature , hoping we can savor this energy for the work ahead .

It is hard to say goodbye to such a beautiful place, a place that seems to make people more sun tan and beautiful- hopefully not just on the outside but on the inside too.

Spring breaking on this whimsical island definitely felt like “Uwa mgbde “ and I look forward to returning again soon.

You’re welcome to follow us along on more of our travel adventures as we continue our travels.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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Evening Rosary

October 14, 2023October 15, 2023 MindMuser MD

As a young girl growing up in Africa, there are some memories that I will always have so vividly.

One of those memories was that of my father summoning us to gather in prayer nightly.

Rain or shine , at each dusk, my father would began a call to gather our family and our house helps, to the living room in Aba where we all knelt down to begin reciting the rosary.

Come to think of it, his father , my grandfather did the same call whenever we all were together in the village. Grandpa had this giant bell that he would ring across the compound , so you had no excuse that you couldn’t hear the rosary call 🤪

In our home , my father typically began and led us through the decades of the rosary, at times calling each kid to lead the next decade. At times, an enthusiastic non sleepy head may volunteer before they were called out to lead the decade .

It seemed like tucked in at the end of those busy fun play days was the daunting rosary time. That prayer time somehow became the PERFECT lullaby for some of us children.

I don’t know what made the rosary so soporific but it was!. Perhaps it was the sing songy nature that made the repetitions of the rosary more entertaining but also sleep inducing. In any case, kneeling down in that old living room invited sleep like none other.

Later on in my adult life, I heard a friend joke that her mother would warn them not to allow the devil to give them sleeping pills during mass… that’s it! I thought, that ‘s EXACTLY it, the devil sure knew how to pass out sleepy candies during rosary time .

Some days I resisted the sleep and other times I have memories of my father calling out my name, or my sibling nudging me to wake up – especially when it was my turn to lead a decade of the rosary and instead they heard me snoring (?)… okay I never really snore right DH?😉

In any event, the five decade of the holy rosary would eventually come to an end , Ofcourse not before Dad added all the EXTRA prayers to the saints and holy ones.. finally it was done! Phew ( at least for that evening)

We all would have a sigh of relief or a feeling of accomplishment OR sometimes I would find myself fast asleep wayyy past the end of the rosary, lights turned out and all!

Now why would y’all just leave me here in a kneeling rosary position with my head on the couch , and the audacity to turn off lights?!

Plus now instead of sleeping in my tented bed I was now sleeping alone in a rosary kneeling uncomfortable position in the living room floor, at the mercy of those pesky Aba mosquitoes … ugh!

I wonder whether leaving the sleepy heads behind was some sort of punishment for them falling asleep during the holy rosary.

The truth is I have also witnessed how the rosary sleepyhead abandonment happens So I can relate to how the sleepyheads get to be left behind.

First the rosary ends , after multiple efforts to nudge them into compliance. Then the effort to tap and nudge them awake would commence, and then eventually folks just get tired of waking them up and split.

I must say the littler you are, the greater your chances at rosary rescue, since you could easily be carried to your bed. As you grew taller , bigger , heavier to lift … well goodluck!

Our family nightly rosary routine came to my mind as I was appreciating the last week that I spent with my father after his surgery in New Orleans.

Dad and I had a chance to spend the ist week of sept 2022 together in his hospital room. My mother , my sister and my three brothers all got a chance to visit Dad as well . One of the nights right before Dad and I tucked in for the night . Him in his first ever hospital bed that I knew, and me on those uncomfortable guest couches that is a sign hospitals REALLY don’t want folks spending the night . Anyways story for another day .

Dad and I prayed five decade of the holy rosary and yes plus him leading all the EXTRA Catholic prayers at the end – I listened . I marveled at his faith through all these years. I cherished his heart.

This 83 yr old father of mine had made it a daily habit to say his rosary nightly. Some he said with us as a family , and others you found him kneeling quietly at his bed praying , muttering his heart to God in prayers.

That night at the hospital, we muttered our hearts together to God, we prayers for so many things , especially healing. He prayed for others and prayed in thanksgiving for having survived his surgery… or so we thought.

My father died in less than two weeks after our last hospital rosary together. He was called home to God and now is one of my guardian angels from heaven .

Thank you Dad for being a wonderful father to me and for teaching me to rely on the Holy rosary ❤️🙏🏾

What are your early childhood memories

around prayers or other meaningful traditions ?

Please share with us if you care to.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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A King’s Kid

May 12, 2023May 12, 2023 MindMuser MD

A statement from my devotional today really caught my curiosity. The speaker said “ remember when you feel doubt you’re a King’s kid”.

This is because “ but as many as received him, to them he gave right to become children of God” -John 1:12

God is King and that makes us a King’s kid, as long as we believe and receive Jesus.

I am loving the image of myself as a King’s kid, a princess to be precise. Reflecting on this has elevated my spirit, boasting my confidence, infact maybe even giving me an extra pep in my step today.

I don’t know about you but the thought of being a princess sounds pretty fabulous to me. What images of royalty does this conjure up for you in your mind?

Seriously this message really is so timely for me. Timely because even for just today, I needed to not doubt me, or my abilities , especially as my strength weans and I feel weary under the pressure of my doctor/ mothering TO DO lists.

After all, I AM a King’s kid , a precious daughter of the most high God.

I pray this statement settles in your spirit and encourages you too , as you read this .

Remember when you feel doubt, don’t forget that you too are a King’s Kid, and that is a very special place to be!💕

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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Duckie Drama

February 5, 2023February 6, 2023 MindMuser MD

We have an adventurous family with lots of travel interest.

White water rafting on the salmon river in the wilderness of Idaho during the hot summer month of July 2021.

This was during the pandemic and a 5 days river trip vacation seemed like a reasonable idea.

You see we had had a great time floating down the Colorado river the previous summer with our extended family, so this time we invited several family friends to float down the Idaho salmon river with us.

Our traveling crew consisted of at least 6 different families , some were life long friends while others just met for the first time the morning we set out on our on River trip. Everyone was wonderful.

In fact there are so many stories to tell you about this trip however I will focus on one particular floating day .

We had river guides who were truly shepherding us and keeping us safe while we enjoyed the adventures on the river.

There was an inflatable raft called the “ Duckie” that was an option for any takers to raft down the river . I asked DH if he would ride with me and he gladly accepted ( ofcourse not before making sure that no other takers who wanted a turn to float down on this particular Duckie)

Our kids stayed on more sturdy rafts with family friends and were having a blast . Some of the moms were either on other rafts or on the bigger boat calmly enjoying the warm breeze and nature with a cold beverage…. Smart😉

I choose more adventure ,so off DH and I went on this “Duckie” . I sat in the front providing the “ power” while DH was behind steering us in the direction we needed to travel . I had a lot of laughter and squeals as I enjoyed riding the waves while DH seemed to be enjoying hitting rapids that produced even more laughter and squeals from me.

Then I started to overhear the guides talking about needing to stop to “regroup “ before the last rapid before we get to camp for the night . The head guide was giving instructions to the order guides who were rating the order boats.

I started to feel a bubble of worry rising within me as I observed them “plotting“ from our Duckie. So I asked the female guide what they were “plotting “ but her only response was “ it’ll be fun” with a coy smile and a shoulder shrug that I immediately interpreted as a way to calm my nerves.

So I sat back focusing on my rowing to provide the power for our raft while encouraging , okay maybe warning him, DH to steer us safely.

On white water rafting trips, the thing is you can hear the rumbles of the rapids before you even see them, so the suspense is real and palpable!

The guides had given us very specific instructions before that last rapid to avoid the left side at a particular point “ no matter what”.

Apparently that spot on the river has a “ hole “ that people can literally get sucked under into a vortex that seems like a washing machine cycle that is hard to escape from.

So off we go with DH maneuvering our way through the rapids . At the start I felt DH and I working well together and I clearly was trusting him with my life in those moments more than ever .Oh , did I mention that I am not a strong swimmer? Like at all!

Things seemed to be going well until BOOM! … I feel myself get knocked off the Duckie from the side and I went under the water for what felt like A LONG QUIET EERIE TIME.

I popped up again briefly again only to be hit in the head by the same Duckie. That was actually my saving grace as I grabbed on for dear life while my feet dangled in the rushing water.

Let me back up a sec to say that I actually began praying in my mind once I felt me worrying about the upcoming rapid as I was observing the guide prepping.

Psalm 23 was on my mind and I thought about God’s protection of us as we go through “ raging waters”. Those rapids definitely were raging waters😏

God had allowed me to hold on to that Duckie and then I realized too that DH had managed to stay on the Duckie the whole time. This was a double lucky blessing 1) DH was safe 2) DH was able to continue steering the Duckie so I just had to keep holding on to it since I was no strong swimmer.

Truth is I somehow managed to stay calm throughout the raft accident.

I believe it was purely the Holy Spirit that accompanied and encouraged me in those moments when I was under water or struggling to get a hold of that Duckie.

Ofcourse our Duckie accident caused some panic with our children and friends watching as all of this took place. I had lost a water shoe in all the chaos but can you believe one of the other boaters somehow found my shoe and we reunited post Duckie drama.

Shortly after the ordeal we made it to camp for the night and I was mostly quiet and reflective., probably still in shock from all that had transpired.

Nonetheless , the hugs with my children, DH and time spent at camp friends somehow held more value that evening because being alive felt like SUCH a gift!

Have you had a time when you felt you were close to loosing your life? What thoughts did your mind entertain?

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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Giving thanks in every season💕

November 24, 2022November 26, 2022 MindMuser MD

In every season give thanks – 1 Thessalonians 5:18

This season of my life has been hard.

I have been challenged by loss and grief.

Waking up to my First thanksgiving without my father physically present on earth is TOUGH!

To say I miss you is such an understatement 💔

**Arrival hugs the day before thanksgiving day 2021**

I no longer have the casual opportunity to physically express my gratitude to him with my words, a hug,a plate of yummy thanksgiving cooking, or jocular conversations shared on a thanksgiving morning family walk on the trail to Stacy Parks.

My thoughts wonder deeply into an existential plane… What does your view from heaven look like now? Are you gathered in heaven with your parents and other family members enjoying great laughs with the communion of saints? Is food even a thing in heaven?

Now your image mostly exists in my mind and my heart. Your eyes always so full of love and I only imagine that this love is intensified from heaven now .

Therefore your love goes on.. even in death.

I am choosing to give thanks to God for this love and all the manifestations of that love in my life .

You see , because my Dad loved so freely, he also accepted and gave so freely this love.

My dad’s love and acceptance of my DH , despite our cultural differences, while some Naija parents would have given a side eye to an interracial marriage and therefore blocked blessings – he did not, and not only welcomed my DH with open arms but supported our union true and true.

This gift of love and acceptance has therefore abounded exponentially in my life in so many angles.

Wherever I look I can see the manifestation of love in my life .

I see it in you my DH, I see it in my children, I see in my mother and siblings, I see it in my wonderful Oma and Opa and extended family and in laws, I see it in my Dedes and my Dadas, I see it in my cousins and their children, i see it in my dog Teddy, I see it in my sweet friends , I see it in my HOLLA group, I see it in my WOW group , I see it in my work and the ability to provide mental health services to those in need, I see it in the opportunity to be living in a beautiful country with my roots extended from the great continent of Africa.

**Hanging out on thanksgiving day 2021**

I see it in you ,my readers and I am grateful.

So yes, it’s a bittersweet thanksgiving , however I can still see so clearly the many reasons to give thanks.

I hope that you can look around you and your own unique circumstances and see reasons to be THANKFUL♥️🙏🏾

As always, thank you for reading my blog and of course I welcome your comments and any shared experiences .

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*DH ( darling husband)

*Dedes( Uncles ) Dadas(Aunties)